I just got out of a long arduous relationship which was really difficult to get over (still am, sorta). Not feeling so good about the male species, or getting back into a relationship right now, but hey, I?m single, I?m cute, guys are calling me and I want to see what all this dating fuss is about…something which I know very little about and what I do know comes from DCB. scary, right? But darnit, my ex owes me over $3grand, so at the very least, I think I deserve a free night out, right?
So this is my question. There?s one guy I?m not really that interested in, (I think he?s a republican, yuck) but ok he?s cute, friendly and really wants to hang out. I definitely don?t want to hook up or anything. I just want to go out, see what he?s about, enjoy some food, conversation etc?give him a chance, I guess. Maybe have some funny stories to tell the next day, offer a good restaurant review. Is there something wrong with that? So do we go dutch because I don’t want to put out? I always offer, anyway, not that I want to now though, because I?m broke. Or do I cancel and not even go out with him at all? What if I turn up the charm, and he wants a second date? If I?m still not that interested, how do I proceed? I don?t want to waste anyone?s time or lead anybody on here?so go ahead, be blunt, and dcb, feel
free to offend. I don?t mind.
DCB says,
The goal of the woman is to get the most goods and services from a guy without having to spread her legs in return. You don’t seem to be into him or else you wouldn’t be worried about what you have to bring into the relationship. Rocking his world sexually should be payment enough, but since you still carry baggage from your ex, I recommend that you stop dating this guy immediately and send me a picture. Only then will I be able to give you the proper advice. But seriously, if you are not interested in a guy and won’t put out, DON’T LET ME HIM SPEND MONEY ON YOU. That’s a pretty low thing to do.
Kathryn says,
Real helpful there, DCB.
If you already know you’re really not interested in the Republican guy, I do think it’s inappropriate to give him false hope, which one date could do. That said, if so many guys are calling, why not let one you could (or do!) like be the one treating you to nights out? Why do you have to take advantage of this one?
And finally, if you are thinking your ex’s $3,000 debt to you should be paid off by future suitors’ generosity, I am truly sorry for them.
If you liked this post then I think you will like my Roosh's Game Tips Email Newsletter For Guys. It's completely free and your first newsletter will be about how to meet girls in coffee shops. Following that will be newsletters on getting phone numbers, dealing with flakes, teasing girls the right way, handling cockblockers, meeting girls in foreign countries, and a whole lot more. Your email address will always remain private and you can unsubscribe at any time. To sign up put your first name and email address below and click the button.
I was under the impression that you’re supposed to go on dates to determine if you like the person.
If you’re already inclined to think he’s not your type you should pay. Otherwise you’re just doing it for the free meal and you really don’t want to be THAT woman.
If it turns out he is a republican then pick a fight with a couple of really big guys, make him fight them, and steal his wallet. It’s a good way to make sure he never calls you again.
Comment by Ibid on 03/30/06.
People this vain exist?
Comment by Stephen on 03/30/06.
Why don’t you tell him that you’ll pay for your meal so that he doesn’t expect sex, but if you do end up having sex with him, he should re-imburse you for the meals?
When I broke up with my boyfriend, I met this guy who asked me out on a date. I told him the truth: I was fresh off a breakup, wasn’t ready to move on, etc. He said he just wanted to be friends, which was just a lie. He paid for dinner, but I didn’t kiss him or anything in return. Same thing happened on date 2. I should have cut him off right there, since I wasn’t attracted to him, but I went on 2 more dates within a span of 2 months. We went dutch on both of them. As a girl, I totally understand what you want to do, and it is wrong, but go out with him anyway. Just don’t send any misleading cues.
Comment by Ariel on 03/30/06.
From a guy’s point of view you need to understand that this guy likes you, want to date you, and yes- wants to sleep with you.
I think you should be upfront as Ariel said and tell him the situation. Do not lead him on. What it sounds like you are saying is: I am still hung up on my ex, I do not want to sleep with anyone new, but I miss the attention of dating someone.
Seriously, why can’t you just be ok with being alone. Date no one. Hang out with your friends. Find a hobby. Go to the gym. Take a class. Play video games if you are desperate enough. The bottom line is that you are dating for all the wrong reasons. Dating IS to find someone to have sex with, to hang out with, to be romantic with at some point. If ya ain’t interested- why are you dating??
Comment by Another Anon on 03/30/06.
What’s wrong with Republicans? They have lots of money. And supposedly, they’re the kinkiest in bed. You should use this as an opportunity for hot sexing and earning back that $3,000 (was your ex Green Party by chance? figures).
Comment by NotaRepublican on 03/30/06.
^^^^ and Bingo was his name-o
Comment by Andy on 03/30/06.
ha, you guys are awesome! thanks. i guess i hate to be the one to diss someone because of their political affiliation, but you know, come to think of it, i’m in no hurry. i have plenty of friends and hobbies to keep me entertained until the next administration comes around…
Comment by cute and broke on 03/30/06.
“Maybe have some funny stories to tell the next day, offer a good restaurant review.”
Years ago, while I was working on the Hill, a coworker told us her Lenten sacrifice was not accepting dates with guys she wasn’t interested in just for the free meal. Then I read the above. You’re gonna lead him on and let him buy you dinner just so you can mock him with your friends the next day?! Thank God I’m leaving this city soon, the women here are too callous and selfish to date anyway.
