First Date DC

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Friends zone danger

Nick writes,

I have been dating this girl who is pretty shy for about a month now. I think it has been about five dates. Normally I would have slept with or at least made out with a girl after a month. However, she has had bronchitis for the past two weeks, so I have been able to do is give her a brief peck of a kiss and just put my arm around her and what not when we watch a movie. Because we haven’t crossed that getting intimate boundary yet I am in unfamiliar territory for dating a girl this long. I’m hoping that she will be ok by next weekend. Normally I wouldn’t make any comments about kissing and just go for it, but because of the situation I have said stuff like, “I really want to kiss you but I don’t want to get sick.”

Also, as I mentioned she is pretty shy. She doesn’t really call me, but always returns my calls right away if I miss her. Normally if a girl doesn’t call me that much I assume that she isn’t really interested, but this girl talks about doing things in the future and has taken me along to meet her friends and stuff. Plus, she hasn’t ever initiated any physical affection, but doesn’t respond adversely if I do. I don’t know if it is because she’s been feeling crappy though. I really like her, but I can’t read her that well. Any advice ?

DCB says,

Newsflash: her bronchitis is imaginary. As a shy girl she has invented crafty ways to avoid getting intimate. Bronchitis is not something you can catch like a cold — it’s an illness that lies deep within her lungs, sort of like how you are deep in the friends zone. “I really want to kiss you”? What kind of lame ass shit is that? Just because she is throwing you off your game doesn’t mean you have to borrow lines from the movies to fill in the awkward silences.

My suggestion is to call her out on the bronchitis and say deep down she is a scared little girl who can’t handle intimacy with a man such as yourself. But before you do, have a camera ready. I want you to take a picture the instant she freaks out and then email it to me. I’ll be able to judge in her reaction if she was lying about the bronchitis or not.

Kathryn says,

Um, sounds to me like you guys had two weeks’ worth of opportunities to kiss prior to her bronchitis diagnosis. Why didn’t anything happen then? Also, if she’s well enough to have dates with you, why isn’t she well enough to kiss you? Are you guys 14? Is she scared to death of her first kiss?

No matter what the answers to those questions are, and no matter how much longer she claims to have this nokissitis crap, PLANT ONE ON HER. Do not delay - on your next date, kiss her and end this nonsense.

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Published by FDDC on April 27, 2006.


10 Comments »

Do your homework and look up some symtoms of bronchitis if you are unsure she has it. I remember I was once diagnosed with it, but it turned out to be incorrect. As far as I remember it is a long time illness, 5 years type. Check online about it and figure out if she is ditching you or telling the truth. Oh and what is your call on her virginity?

Comment by Nabs on 04/27/06.


Was she diagnosed with brochitis by an MD? Or was this a lame self diagnosis? LoL…Too funny. Besides… if you really do “like” her why are you getting so bent out of shape just because she doesn’t follow your historical time table for physical contact? Why not just enjoy the time you spend with her and get over yourself…….LOL

Comment by Jada on 04/27/06.


Bronchitis is an inflammation of the lining of the lungs. It can be caused by a cold, by smoking, fumes from household cleaners, or a number of other irritants. Allergies, a real problem this time of year, can simulate the symptoms of bronchitis. True bronchitis can last a few days or several weeks.

So, you probably don’t have to worry about catching anything from her, but that doesn’t mean she’s not icky.
And 5 dates is nothing. It’s the beginning of a relationship. Heaven forbid you might actually have to get to know her and find out if you’re compatable before having sex.
Look, she’s shy. She’s afraid of rejection. That’s why she’s not making the first moves. So you’ll have to initiate most stuff for awhile. Just don’t rush things. If you’re really into this girl then take your time and do it right. If you’re not into her then don’t mess with her further by banging her and leaving.

Comment by Ibid on 04/27/06.


I agree with DCB (sort of). It sounds like the bronchitis is imaginary. I just recently had it and didn’t go anywhere past my couch for a good two weeks and coughed like a chain smoker another week and a half after that. I certainly wasn’t out dating some guy I had barely know. If she’s as shy as you say, she could be a virgin or in a very long drought. You’ll just have to go for it.

Comment by Heather on 04/27/06.


Tell her that you can’t catch Bronchitis by her going down on you.

:)

Comment by anon on 04/27/06.


Why do you want to date a girl with bronchitis anyway? Do you really want her to pass her sickly genes onto your child?

That’s why I refuse to date anyone with one of those peanut allergies. Survival of the fittest.

Comment by Sally on 04/27/06.


Sally, you could just not have kids and date whoever you like.

Comment by Ibid on 04/27/06.


Ideally.

Comment by Sally on 04/27/06.


>> Sally, you could just not have kids and date whoever you like.
>
> Ideally.

Really? Cause I’ve been seedless for over 5 years now.

Comment by Ibid on 04/27/06.


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