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	<title>Comments on: He cheated. I think.</title>
	<link>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think</link>
	<description>"but seriously, when should i call?"</description>
	<pubDate>Wed, 10 Mar 2010 08:45:11 +0000</pubDate>
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		<title>By: nabeel</title>
		<link>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5829</link>
		<author>nabeel</author>
		<pubDate>Tue, 22 Aug 2006 14:06:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5829</guid>
					<description>While I would never accuse anyone of cheating without any real evidence to back it up, I would go with your gut instinct.  Maybe it's not necessarily cheating, but some other thing that makes you not trust him entirely.  Spend a little more time trying to figure what the root issue is?  If you keep getting back to "he might be cheating", then he possibly is.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>While I would never accuse anyone of cheating without any real evidence to back it up, I would go with your gut instinct.  Maybe it&#8217;s not necessarily cheating, but some other thing that makes you not trust him entirely.  Spend a little more time trying to figure what the root issue is?  If you keep getting back to &#8220;he might be cheating&#8221;, then he possibly is.</p>
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		<title>By: anon</title>
		<link>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5835</link>
		<author>anon</author>
		<pubDate>Tue, 22 Aug 2006 15:15:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5835</guid>
					<description>You seem to immediately assume he was cheating...any chance YOU were cheating as well???</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>You seem to immediately assume he was cheating&#8230;any chance YOU were cheating as well???</p>
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		<title>By: H.</title>
		<link>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5838</link>
		<author>H.</author>
		<pubDate>Tue, 22 Aug 2006 15:35:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5838</guid>
					<description>Nope.  Not in the least.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Nope.  Not in the least.</p>
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		<title>By: Anonymous</title>
		<link>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5840</link>
		<author>Anonymous</author>
		<pubDate>Tue, 22 Aug 2006 16:45:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5840</guid>
					<description>70% of relationships cheat.  The other 30% spend their evenings jacking off to porn.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>70% of relationships cheat.  The other 30% spend their evenings jacking off to porn.</p>
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		<title>By: saturn8isgreat</title>
		<link>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5843</link>
		<author>saturn8isgreat</author>
		<pubDate>Tue, 22 Aug 2006 17:06:35 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5843</guid>
					<description>I don't know how good "confronting" him will do.  I've never seen a man that has been confronted by a woman just "fess up" or "spill his guts" about whatever shady stuff he's been doing.  It's usually more of a duck and weave pattern, so you never really get the answers you're looking for anyways.  

That said, if you do confront him, have a clear idea of how you want the conversation to go, and what action you will take with each outcome.  For instance, if all he does is deny and say "you're crazy", then you will do/say _______.  If he says yes, he made out with one girl and she meant nothing, then you will do/say ________.  Etc.  And then stick you your convictions.  Good luck!</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I don&#8217;t know how good &#8220;confronting&#8221; him will do.  I&#8217;ve never seen a man that has been confronted by a woman just &#8220;fess up&#8221; or &#8220;spill his guts&#8221; about whatever shady stuff he&#8217;s been doing.  It&#8217;s usually more of a duck and weave pattern, so you never really get the answers you&#8217;re looking for anyways.  </p>
<p>That said, if you do confront him, have a clear idea of how you want the conversation to go, and what action you will take with each outcome.  For instance, if all he does is deny and say &#8220;you&#8217;re crazy&#8221;, then you will do/say _______.  If he says yes, he made out with one girl and she meant nothing, then you will do/say ________.  Etc.  And then stick you your convictions.  Good luck!</p>
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		<title>By: aurelgrooves</title>
		<link>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5849</link>
		<author>aurelgrooves</author>
		<pubDate>Tue, 22 Aug 2006 17:26:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5849</guid>
					<description>indeed, your gut is usually right. in my experience, the people who nod and wink, well they probably have firsthand knowledge or something to do with it. as such they'll never actually fess up, and neither will your boy without concrete evidence to nail him. your trust has been breached, either by the snickeriness of these nodders and winkers (his friends?) or the underlying lack of reassurance from him. so whatever it was, a meaningless kiss or some emotional connection he found with someone else, this will drive you crazy for the rest of your relationship. so think about all the things you've done for this guy and what you've gotten in return? you probably deserve way better. </description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>indeed, your gut is usually right. in my experience, the people who nod and wink, well they probably have firsthand knowledge or something to do with it. as such they&#8217;ll never actually fess up, and neither will your boy without concrete evidence to nail him. your trust has been breached, either by the snickeriness of these nodders and winkers (his friends?) or the underlying lack of reassurance from him. so whatever it was, a meaningless kiss or some emotional connection he found with someone else, this will drive you crazy for the rest of your relationship. so think about all the things you&#8217;ve done for this guy and what you&#8217;ve gotten in return? you probably deserve way better.</p>
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		<title>By: Anonymous</title>
		<link>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5852</link>
		<author>Anonymous</author>
		<pubDate>Tue, 22 Aug 2006 18:16:51 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5852</guid>
					<description>Saturn8: that's called "manalyzing" and is a waste of your time.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Saturn8: that&#8217;s called &#8220;manalyzing&#8221; and is a waste of your time.</p>
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		<title>By: Anonymous</title>
		<link>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5858</link>
		<author>Anonymous</author>
		<pubDate>Tue, 22 Aug 2006 19:38:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5858</guid>
					<description>if you think that it is a possibility, then you dont think much of his character -- move on</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>if you think that it is a possibility, then you dont think much of his character &#8212; move on</p>
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		<title>By: Phil</title>
		<link>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5859</link>
		<author>Phil</author>
		<pubDate>Tue, 22 Aug 2006 19:43:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5859</guid>
					<description>Dump him.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Dump him.</p>
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		<title>By: rock creek rambler</title>
		<link>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5861</link>
		<author>rock creek rambler</author>
		<pubDate>Tue, 22 Aug 2006 20:18:44 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5861</guid>
					<description>"The other 30% spend their evenings jacking off to porn."

Yeah, so?</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>&#8220;The other 30% spend their evenings jacking off to porn.&#8221;</p>
<p>Yeah, so?</p>
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		<title>By: first year</title>
		<link>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5872</link>
		<author>first year</author>
		<pubDate>Wed, 23 Aug 2006 01:36:35 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5872</guid>
					<description>Makes me wonder how the actual relationship is going aside from this, clues are everywhere....</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Makes me wonder how the actual relationship is going aside from this, clues are everywhere&#8230;.</p>
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		<title>By: Stephen</title>
		<link>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5874</link>
		<author>Stephen</author>
		<pubDate>Wed, 23 Aug 2006 02:22:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5874</guid>
					<description>The fact that it was long distance speaks volumes about where the relationship was.
</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>The fact that it was long distance speaks volumes about where the relationship was.</p>
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		<title>By: Quinn</title>
		<link>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5878</link>
		<author>Quinn</author>
		<pubDate>Wed, 23 Aug 2006 03:46:13 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-5878</guid>
					<description>Why waste your time with someone who you don't trust completely? Our instincts are rarely wrong. Something is amiss and you'd be foolish to ignore it. Having a "discussion" with him will do nothing to rectify the situation; he'll either confess (in which case you'll definitely break up) or he'll deny, but that will certainly drive a wedge between you two. It's a lose-lose situation. You're young and there is no reason to spend time in a relationship that causes feelings of doubt, confusion, inadequacy, etc. In short, jump ship.

Furthermore, his behavior during the long distance relationship should not be used as a defense against the idea of his cheating. All he has to do is act all into you for the few days he spends with you a month. Call you enough to make you happy when he's away. Have passionate sex with you when he sees you to keep your emotions on a rope. Act like the world's best boyfriend around your friends to keep up appearances/save face. But the rest of the time, when he was here and you were at college...well lets just say...when the cat's away, the mice come out to play. Harsh, but the sooner you face up to the facade of this relationship, the sooner you can move on. </description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Why waste your time with someone who you don&#8217;t trust completely? Our instincts are rarely wrong. Something is amiss and you&#8217;d be foolish to ignore it. Having a &#8220;discussion&#8221; with him will do nothing to rectify the situation; he&#8217;ll either confess (in which case you&#8217;ll definitely break up) or he&#8217;ll deny, but that will certainly drive a wedge between you two. It&#8217;s a lose-lose situation. You&#8217;re young and there is no reason to spend time in a relationship that causes feelings of doubt, confusion, inadequacy, etc. In short, jump ship.</p>
<p>Furthermore, his behavior during the long distance relationship should not be used as a defense against the idea of his cheating. All he has to do is act all into you for the few days he spends with you a month. Call you enough to make you happy when he&#8217;s away. Have passionate sex with you when he sees you to keep your emotions on a rope. Act like the world&#8217;s best boyfriend around your friends to keep up appearances/save face. But the rest of the time, when he was here and you were at college&#8230;well lets just say&#8230;when the cat&#8217;s away, the mice come out to play. Harsh, but the sooner you face up to the facade of this relationship, the sooner you can move on.</p>
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		<link>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-200118</link>
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		<pubDate>Mon, 21 Jul 2008 20:57:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://www.firstdatedc.com/2006/08/he-cheated-i-think#comment-200118</guid>
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		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong>Rivotril mexico&#8230;.</strong></p>
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